Everyday living in this crazy wild world is not really a fun all the time.There are times that we have a lot bumps on the way, some are too light and some are too heavy to handle. Questions are there but not always being answered, some are just left behind hanging and we are always looking for the best answer we can find to make our feelings better. Maybe some of you out there can relate on how hard problems and trial may be.Some of us are tough enough to stand alone ,but some don't know where to find strength and start all over.
At this moment of my life,i don't know where to start. I am just so tired and facing same experience.Last year i have a miscarriage due to a so called
ECTOPIC Pregnancy that leads me to an emergency surgery that almost took my life.I lost a child and i was in a hard process if recovering, knowing that i lost a baby .Very traumatic and emotionally distracting.We really want to have one but it seems so hard to make it happen.With all the help of my OBGYN, still the ectopic pregnancy happen again.
It is been a year, since i have my first
ectopic pregnancy/miscarriage. last august my OBGYN approves that it is safe to try again and be pregnant again. Since me and my hubby was very anxious to have a baby, we tried and yes after 5 months i am positively 4 weeks pregnant.It is a very nice news. We walk away from the hospital with a smile in our faces. We are happy and hoping that this going to happen. February 23, my Doctor's appointment again for ultrasound.We are happily hit the road and trying to reached the doctors clinic at the right time to keep up with our appointment. Yes, this the day we will know . They have done Ultrasound and they found out that i have the same type of pregnancy again!! Oh God No!! That's what i said when my doctor shake her head and look at me. They don't have choice is to let us know what's going on. We went to the private room and there the doctor says" I am sorry but you have
ectopic pregnancy again " there i broke down and i cried like a baby . Don't know how to handle it ,but i need to face it.They scheduled my emergency surgery again .Right there and then I'm at the holding area waiting for my time for surgery. I just close my eyes and say nothing but God Bless me and my hubby ! Don't choice at this very moment . After and hour and a half I'm at the Operating room and i fall asleep, then when i wake up I'm at the observation room thanking God that i am still alive.
After a day staying at the hospital dealing with my grieving and tears , now i am finally home but still in nightmare. I'm praying i have enough strength to face all of this. I have to tough for my hubby.I have to be strong for my family. No one likes to have such bad and agonizing experience.maybe i am not lucky enough to be a mother and to be completely a woman. Today,i woke up with a new day and with such pain knowing that i can't have a baby anymore through normal process. But still I'm hoping one day all will be well and be normal again.I know it will take a while for me to get over all of this. It's not a very easy path to walk in, nut i need to step on it to move on. Maybe slowly i could pass this road bumps with so much hope and love.My Hubby's love , my family and friends care will keep me from all of this. Yes there will be more tears to shed, more emotions to face! I am still standing and try to be tough to face the world. God Bless!!
May this article and experience of mine can help other woman to learn about more.This could happen to any woman. So hope this experience could help educate women out there.Very traumatizing but i tried to share this with all my heart to help and give you such useful information about this kind of pregnancy.Hope this can help a lot !!